


Am I insane yet?

by Ecinue



Series: to war and back and repeat [3]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Dream is MIA, Mentioned Dream, Mentioned Eret - Freeform, Mentioned Fundy, Mentioned Jschlatt, Mentioned Quackity, Mentioned Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Tommyinnit, Mentioned Tubbo, Mentioned WilburSoot, No Happy Ending ahahahahahahaha, Or Is he?, Or is there?, Post-War, Sad GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Unedited and unbetaed we die like revolutionaries, george is losing it, he's tired bro, schlatt is evil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 08:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26849194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ecinue/pseuds/Ecinue
Summary: He's losing his mind and nobody except one unlikely girl notices.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), don't ship real people - Relationship, platonic only, shippers dni - Relationship
Series: to war and back and repeat [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1952326
Comments: 8
Kudos: 267





	Am I insane yet?

**Author's Note:**

> Unedited and unbetaed as of 10/5/2020.
> 
> Disclaimer: This is an overdramatized version of the Dream SMP events and is not meant to be taken seriously. Everything in the SMP is based on bits for their viewers so don't send the creators any hate for their decisions (Eret's betrayal, Schlatt's choices, etc.). All the people mentioned here are real people and are NOT to be shipped; please have human decency and don't ship them. If any of them are uncomfortable with this fic, I will be more than happy to take this down.

**I used to be a warrior**

Back in the days of the war between L’manberg and Dream SMP, he was one of the most powerful people on the server. He had been the right-hand man of the leader of the Dream SMP, the one that arranged all the meetings between each side, the one that mentioned surrender to Dream instead of straight-up murdering everyone. He was the one that Dream trusted the most, above any other person.

~~Was he?~~

**I used to be glorious**

Back in the days before the election, in the short time that the war ended, everything had been peaceful. He had been very well-known, placed on a pedestal with the other two. People knew him from the war, his face plastered on newspapers that blabbered about the Dream SMP winning the war. His name was everywhere, right next to Dream’s.

**And now I am infamous**

Now, he finds his face on every single newspaper again, for the completely wrong reason. Instead of being next to Dream, it’s next to Schlatt’s. The headlines shout about the election, about Schlatt’s tyranny, about Wilbur and Tommy’s exile, about Techno’s entrance. Everything is going wrong.

He almost misses the war. Almost.

**For every single wrong reason.**

* * *

**Something bigger’s happening**

Schlatt tries as the president emperor of Manberg. That’s one of the main reasons that George stays. Schlatt’s intentions are good despite him going about it in the wrong way. The ram-hybrid (goat? ram?) talks to George about his troubles in a soft voice when they’re alone, he apologizes and trains with Quackity when he isn’t angry, he offers to help Fundy with Fundy’s tasks, and he treats Tubbo like his own son.

But then Schlatt gets angry...and something goes wrong.

**But I can’t seem to grasp it.**

Try as he might, George does not understand most of which is going on. There are only two reasons in which George agrees to support Schlatt. One of them is that Schlatt knows what’s happening with Dream, or at least he has some idea of it. Schlatt stated that he knew what Dream was up to and why he has been missing with the illusion of being neutral. George can only trust the ram-hybrid and pray that he can see Dream again.

**Something sinister is coming,**

The second reason is that there is something off with Schlatt. Schlatt’s personalities do a complete 180 at times and there are times where he has headaches so bad that he can’t recall anything. There’s something going on with Schlatt that is the reason for his mood swings, something that George is determined to get to the bottom of.

**I can sense it deep within.**

* * *

**My mind is choking me**

There are times where he can’t think. He feels as if everything fades away and he’s just walking around aimlessly, not remembering, not knowing, not understanding. It’s blissful to be unaware and every time that he forgets, Quackity is there to bring him back to attention, concern etched over his face. George is quick to play it off as him being tired.

**My vision is going dark**

Sometimes, he’s back in the midst of the war, no longer in the peaceful era. There are explosions from when they blew up L’manberg, there’s the terrifying fear from when Dream is walking on that bridge, about to duel Tommy, there’s the unwavering sense that there’s _something_ watching and he has to be on guard. The war doesn’t quite leave him alone.

**I can’t hear a single thing**

There are times where he can’t hear. Everything is white noise and static and all he can focus on is the ghost of the man who left him and Sapnap behind. All he could focus on was the color of that yellow ( _hideously yellow, a piss-yellow_ ) sweatshirt that the man wore as he announced he would be leaving to go into hiding. All he can focus on is the man who is still missing, the man who was his _true_ leader, not the ram-hybrid.

**My body is failing me.**

* * *

**The one that I long for**

(There’s a man who hides in the woods, pouring day and night over an ancient book. There’s a man who longs for his friends and family, having left them behind in pursuit of the truth. There’s a man who sits in caves, wishing that he was back home with his best friends. There’s a man who doesn’t regret leaving, knowing that the truth is crucial for their survival.)

**Has gone with the wind,**

He’s at Eret’s castle, waiting for the king to return from his resource gathering. There’s someone familiar standing in the shadows, observing him quietly.

“You’re losing yourself,” Niki says, her voice firm. “How long do you intend to stay?”

“I don’t know,” He responds. “When the war ends, I suppose.”

“The war won’t end so long as Schlatt continues his dictatorship, George,” She whispers. “You sense it too, don’t you? Something’s _wrong_.”

George leveled his gaze with hers, cold and unwavering. “Here I thought you hated Schlatt.”

Rage flashed through her eyes as she stood her crowd, her new cape billowing behind her. “I do. I hate him with a burning passion. He took my home and _ruined_ it. He broke my family. Of course, I hate him. That doesn’t mean I’m oblivious to what’s going on.” 

“...you said you’d try to fix everything,” He says quietly. “Did you mean it?”

She nods. “Schlatt will be sorry for what he’s done to our lands.”

“No, not that,” He shakes his head frantically. He can sense Eret nearby. “Did you mean you would fix _everything_ ? You’ll bring _him_ back?”

Realization strikes her and she nods. “I’ll do everything I can to bring him back for you, George.”

He nods shakily and she doesn’t mention how he looks like he’s on the verge of collapsing, far from the glorious warrior he once was during the war.

**Fleeing to the forests**

He watches from afar as Tubbo makes trips to and back from the nearby forests. The poor boy was caught up in this war unnecessarily. He goes to the forests sometimes, trailing behind Tubbo. Tubbo goes to see Tommy and Wilbur and Techno at Pogtopia. George has nobody to see. Punz is busy supporting Schlatt in the very background while Sapnap is off committing arson.

~~Dream, come home, please.~~

**Hidden deep within.**

* * *

**Everything is spinning**

Something is wrong. Something is not right.

**Everything is a mess.**

Sometimes when they’re in the White House, everything goes wrong. Schlatt is bipolar, sometimes screeching with rage while sobbing in pain. Quackity is sturdy, able to hold against the weird force. Fundy is going crazy, his original intentions forgotten. Tubbo is scarred, terrified to disobey.

**Everything is crazy**

George thinks he’s crazy, as crazy as one could be. He swears that he can see another creature, one who’s figure he cannot discern. He sees it when Schlatt has his _moments_ , he sees it when Quackity and Tubbo are quaking, he sees it when Fundy forgets-

He sees it in the mirror behind him when he’s losing his mind.

**Am I insane yet?**

**Author's Note:**

> Poor George is not having a good time. I made him a friend of Niki tho cause they're both tired and want their fam to be okay. Probably second-worst time only to Tommy, Tubbo, and Purpled. Angst goes brrrrrrrr  
> I wrote this poem in physics class :DDD
> 
> I used to be a warrior  
> I used to be glorious  
> And now I am infamous  
> For every single wrong reason.
> 
> Something bigger's happening  
> But I can't seem to grasp it.  
> Something sinister is coming,  
> I can sense it deep within.
> 
> My mind is choking me  
> My vision is going dark  
> I can't hear a single thing  
> My body is failing me.
> 
> The one that I long for  
> He's gone with the wind,  
> Fleeing to the forests  
> Hidden deep within.
> 
> Everything is spinning  
> Everything is a mess.  
> Everything is crazy  
> Am I insane yet?
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this! Kudos, comments, bookmarks, anything is appreciated greatly! Thank you for reading my fic!  
> Feel free to come yell at me on twitter!  
> https://twitter.com/ecinue_unicorn


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